Here's what could happen in a new business venture...
It’s that time of year again, and the airways are filled with Festive tunes. We’ve joined in but cunningly changed the title to the 12 Days of Business – clever huh!
Although based on the well-known, traditional composition, this song is not what you’d expect of a normal ’12 Days of Christmas’ rendition. Based on an outstanding musical arrangement, produced by acclaimed musician James Harrison, this performance is like no other you’ve heard before.
We had some more graphics produced by our excellent resident artist Harriet Teagle and we produced an animated insight into, what could be, the first 12 months of a new business venture.
Sing along to the 12 Days of Business!
It’s the First day of business and all I have with me,
is an idea and a cup of coffee.
In the Second week of business, I also have with me,
Two company names, an idea and a cup of coffee.
In the Third week of business, I also have with me,
Three styles of logo, my company name, an idea and a cup of coffee.
In the Fourth week of business, I now have with me,
Four brand proposals, Three draft values,
Two new investors, an idea and a cup of coffee.
In the Fifth month of business, I now have with me,
Five prototypes…(Not bad if I say so myself)
Four competitors, Three brand revisions,
Two more investors, a vision and a cup of coffee.
In the Sixth month of business, it so good to see,
Six brand new orders,
Five employees… (hand-picked by yours sincerely),
Four social profiles, three days of cashflow,
two vat returns, a headache and a cup of coffee.
In the Seventh month of business, you can clearly see,
Seven lost contracts, Six unfilled orders,
Five accidents… (they weren’t my fault guv’nor)
Four thousand emails, Three sickly workers,
Two nasty letters and it looks like a breach of IP.
In the Eighth month of business, investors gave to me,
Eight days of audit, Seven formal complaints, Six days of planning,
Five new goals (Like I didn’t ‘ave enough to do),
Four days off sick, three ex-employees,
two tribunals and I’ve switched to drinking herbal tea.
In the Ninth month of business, I’m feeling quite gloomy,
Nine data breaches, Eight investigations,
Seven poor reviews, Six unpaid invoice,
Five days to pay…(I was just waiting for the reminders)…
Four days of cashflow, Three people short, Two weeks of backlog,
And my partner misses me
In the Tenth month of business, my pub-li-city,
Is Ten new campaigns, Nine grand on AdWords,
Eight types of clickbait, Seven Facebook lives, Six hundred tweets,
Five new leads… (which doesn’t seem much for the effort)…
Four staff leave, Three new complaints, Two final demands,
and my hands are feeling very clammy
In the Eleventh month of business, complaints in summary,
Eleven Access requests, Ten discriminations, Nine data breaches,
Eight tax evasions, Seven angry vendors, Six health and safety,
Five bully claims… (I was only tellin’ them what to do)
Four stress at works, Three unfair trading,
Two crying kids and a partner that’s leaving me.
In the Twelfth month of business, this don’t look good to me,
Twelve lost tribunals, Eleven insurance payouts, Ten staff are leaving,
Nine creditor petitions, Eighty thousand overdraft,
Seven defaulted loans, Six unpaid workers, Five court visits,
Four trips to the docs, Three bailiffs met, Two threatening letters…
I should have focused on compliancy
(now where’s my drink?)
And here's the compliance bit...
There is a serious side to this song and it’s that businesses tend not to focus on staying on the right side of the law.
So to make sure we do, here are some appropriate acknowledgements:
- The song has been in circulation since 1780, so no residual copyright.
- The backing track is produced by J H Backing Tracks, and used on this recording by courtesy of James Harrison.
- Original Artwork by Harriet Teagle.
- Lyrics & sung by Russell Cosway (in one take!)
- Video production by Mike Saville.
But just in case...
If you are affected by any of the issues raised in this presentation, please do contact us!